Gifts: part 1.

 Mmm-kay, Kids… We are going to talk about gifts today. No, not the kind YOU give at Birthdays, Holidays, Special Occasions, Anniversary's, Social Events and what not. I mean "Gifting's", like the kind you possess, hone and craft to show how lovely and talented… oh, and Important you are to the world. Then of course there is by these gifting's you show absolute Glory to God for dropping said Gift into your existence. Ok… So what do I show?

 Wow! That is the smakeroo isn't it? ANNND… to top it off as to kinda slap you again, you get multiple gifts and you have absolutely no clue as to how to share them or even recognize what your gifts are. Oh, and check this… some people run around denying their gifts, never to know the shear magnitude God want's to bless into their Life. Well… I've been wrestling with what my gifts are. All my life, everyone around me tells me what they think my gifts are. But I just don't know. Then I think, "Hea, I feel like I have a seldom touched gift in me I'd like to explore, I've shown exceptional talents in and around this media, I will dip my toe in and test the water…" But see here is where I'm at… I'm not about "Try" anything. Did you not read the TITLE of my blog? "I don't try anything, I just do it!"

 I'm living this Life without trying. I'm here, in this head, moving to the beat with this body delighted at the breath of life and the wake of a new day. Cycling threw routine after routine, existing in freedom, but not quenched by my status. Remaining ever faithful, ever sure, there is something... something spectacular I am meant to do! Raise your hand if you feel this way… hands all over the,(well let's be honest, I only have so many readers) CITY… are going up right now! Yea, are we ever quenched of our thirst? Do we ever feel completely fulfilled?

 Well the Bible says… Yes, I know! Not the point of this statement, but thank you for your care and understanding. Not my point today, try back tomorrow, perhaps I'll be so moved. Really, I'm not to terribly far from what the Bible says(just wanted to be cheeky for a second), because I want to express a slightly deviated view of the topic at hand.

 "HOW TO RECOGNIZE YOUR GIFTS."

Still with me?

 Good, I was to say the least, a smidge worried. Would you really want to see how this plays out or is this guy so completely out to lunch that it's time to grab mine? Up to you...

 Ok, first. I'm not looking for a pity party or any forms of condolence, so please and thank you. You maybe thinking, "I know you and I know what your gifts are and you have nothing to bitch about"… really? Your wrong. What you may think is a gift for me, may actually be the thing that I hate the most.

 Prime example, I have been told my entire adult life that I am a heck of a Salesman. That I can talk anyone into buying anything. Ok, folks to me, this is not a gift, it's a curse! Gonna drop a few reasons why on ya, hang in there. #1 I hate money, I hate everything about it. The fact that we use it and are slave to it. #2 I'm a good liar and I hate that about myself. #3 I am tired of people telling me I can talk their ear off! "You have a Great Mouthpiece, you can really speak!" Fuck you! I can type too! I know a lil' sign language, wanna see? This subject heats me, can you tell?

 I apologize for my use of profanity, if I have offended your delicate nature… this boat ride is not for you, time to jump ship. 

 Back to the lesson at hand. I used to take pride in owning a living room, office or lunch table. Didn't matter where, I would pull you in, feed you what you may or may not have wanted to hear and you would buy my product… whatever it was. Weed, Alarm Systems, Auto Parts, Pills, Computer's or Upgrades, Holes in your body and the jewelry to go in them, Speed, CD's, Tickets or T-Shirts. I once moved a stolen guitar to a kid who lived three blocks from the origin of said crime… and I was good with that! The heck did I care, I was getting paid!

 I didn't steal the guitar by the way… however I am a pretty good thief, but that's another story. You wanna know the worst part? I had a fixed number in my head that I wanted to get paid… 250.00, good money, fair price and a good mark up since I only paid 100.00 for it from a scared chump(will remain nameless) who ripped it off… cause I told him it was a good idea!("Manipulation", another gift? guess again.) Anyhow, after the transaction was made, I walked away with 460.00 cash, I even waited in their living room as the kid's Dad ran to the ATM. He was so doe eyed, I could have sold him my piece of shit car, sitting just outside, if his kid didn't already have one nicer sitting in the driveway(gotta love car salesmen, my kind of scum).

 The above statement gave absolutely no Glory to God and just remembering it, makes me feel… like I keep un-earthing the dead me, dusting him off, shaking his hand and buying him a drink. That sucks. No, being a salesman is not a gift… at least not for me.

 Now, I know and yes I agree. God has given me a talent for cooking. First born out of necessity to survive and later cultivated by passion to be something more than sustenance. Ok, I'm with that. Now… How do I get paid for this, or better yet how do I share my talent with the World? Then again, why would I want to? The WORLD sucks, really! People are willing to walk right over you as you have your entire life spread out on the sidewalk, desperately trying to fix the new and giant hole in your backpack, that disheveled it's contents, leaving you naked and exposed with all that you have amassed, directly on the floor... No, I'm just unsure if I enjoy being kicked in the nuts repeatedly. The World has a love for doing this to me. I'm sure I'm not the only one.

 So here I am asking, how can I make my gifts work for me? Am I choosing the right one to run with? Am I going to be contented with it's outcome or am I going to hop the next train into interest-ville and take up something new? Here are a list of gifts I may or may not have recognized in myself over time.

Cooking(I love food. Everything about it)
Art(Creating in many different ways)
Music(I love everything about music, instruments, history, culture)
Mechanics/Electronics/Construction(I'm good with my hands)
Agriculture(I'm good with plants, I love the science behind it)
Acting(I'm a good Liar, perhaps in the right media, it's no longer lying)
Writing(I love to write, sometimes life gets in the way and then it spills to the page)
Photography(I have always had a passion for this)
Talking to people(yea, I like to meet people. I love communication)

Dreaming(I used to have wonderful dreams I wanted to fulfill, too long have I put them on hold, till they've all but shut up)

 So now what? What do I do with my list? Find a need, look for that hole and fill it! Easier said than done.

To be continued…

Peace.